Open post

[bringingdowndisaster]

Comments

[gentledawn]

"I... I do love you as a close friend, but that's... That's not it. I'm in love with you. You're...amazing, Zichen." Xingchen feels like he is stumbling over his words and his thoughts. He forces himself to breathe and he smiles a little at what Xue Yang has to say.

"We can stay like this for a little while longer." he murmurs, kissing the top of Xue Yang's head.

[bringingdowndisaster]

Xue Yang's eyes are already closing again, and he drifts off into a slumber.

If his heart still beat, it would definitely be skipping now. You are? What of... what of Xue Yang? It's clear that Xiao Xingchen loves him too. Is it really possible to be in love with more than one person at the same time?

[gentledawn]

Xingchen doesn't bother to rouse Xue Yang. He needs the rest. His hand moves over the other man's back in gentle circles.

"I love him too. He lied to me and made me do horrible things. He hurt you. But when I didn't know him, he showed me who he can be. I love that man and I can't leave him. Zichen..." he gathers his courage, "I want us to be together. I know that sounds like a nightmare and I'm so sorry. But give it a little time. Watch him. If you think he is tricking me again, tell me. I will listen and you and I will leave together."

[bringingdowndisaster]

It's not his favorite idea, but he also realizes that, realistically, there are no better options. He's not leaving Xingchen again, not ever, and as he had already concluded - killing Xue Yang would not only not be satisfying, it would just hurt Xingchen. He may never forgive him if he did that. There's also A-Qing to consider. Song Lan has no idea how she feels about all of this.

Alright. I will keep an eye on him. Something does tell him that Xue Yang isn't looking to trick or deceive Xingchen again, considering how attached he clearly is.

[gentledawn]

"Zichen...thank you." Xingchen doesn't mean to cause his soulmate pain; it flies right in the face of his instincts. But Xue Yang...

He focuses on the poor exhausted man in his arms. His heart belongs to him too. He can't - and won't - abandon him. Pressing his lips to Xue Yang's forehead, he makes him a silent vow.

"When he wakes, he needs to eat. Otherwise he will begin to waste away."

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan can sense how conflicted Xingchen is. This is not easy for any of them. He sighs softly and sits up in bed.

I can make breakfast. Can you ask A-Qing if she wants to help? The girl is still asleep, so he gently nudges her. He'll give Xingchen and Xue Yang a moment alone, as much as he doesn't like the idea of leaving the two of them like that. Still, Xue Yang really doesn't seem like a threat now.

[gentledawn]

Xingchen shifts when Zichen stands, reaching out for him, imploring him to...touch. Just a little.

"I will." he raises his voice gently, "A-Qing? Do you want to help Zichen with breakfast?"

Surprisingly the girl doesn't grumble, but she is cute as she sits up and tries to straighten her hair.

"Sure, Daozhang."

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan smiles at A-Qing and as he passes the bed, he sees Xingchen reach for him. So he gives in to temptation and takes his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. After letting go, he ventures into the kitchen to get started on breakfast.

[gentledawn]

Xingchen gives a happy shiver at the contact and returns the squeeze. He hears his heart in his ears and he is very still, listening to their footsteps as they head to the kitchen.

A-Qing follows Zichen and shows him where everything is, pretending to feel her way around with her hands.

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan smiles a little. He already knows that A-Qing isn't blind, so he puts a hand on her shoulder and shakes his head, pointing to her eyes and nodding. He hopes that it'll get the message across. Maybe she's just doing it out of habit.

Back in the bedroom, Xue Yang is finally starting to stir back to wakefulness. His face is still buried against Xingchen's chest, and he burrows closer, small grumbling sounds leaving him.

[gentledawn]

A-Qing understands immediately and smiles impishly. He doesn't seem mad at least!

"People are nicer to blind girls." and she had been on her own before Xiao Xingchen came along. But now that the secret is out, she helps Zichen acquire the ingredients for breakfast without any trouble.

Xingchen hears the grumbling and he smiles, keeping watch over the other man. Xue Yang can hide for a little while, but then he has to face the world again.

"You're alright."

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan nods in understanding. He definitely doesn't blame her for pretending to be blind. He understands that living on the streets had meant she had to use any trick at her disposal to survive.

While A-Qing acquires the ingredients, Song Lan brews tea for all four of them. It feels good to do something, to distract himself from all the complicated feelings running through him.

Xue Yang glances up at Xingchen's face and presses his lips tenderly to his jaw. What a good way to wake up. He really would like to spend the rest of the day like this, just being held by his Daozhang, but he knows he can't. "Good morning," he murmurs instead.

[gentledawn]

A-Qing is pleased by his immediate understanding. She likes the Daozhangs! They don't jump to conclusions or treat her like a pest. Though she is beginning to question Daozhang Xingchen. Why does he bother with that criminal?

She lays a hand on Zichen's arm - very briefly - letting him know she is on his side.

Xingchen smiles at the sweetness and brushes his lips against Xue Yang's forehead.

"Breakfast will be ready soon. We should get ready." he slowly sits up and rests a hand on Xue Yang's leg, giving him a rush of healing energy to start the day.

a-qing is the biggest songxiao shipper lmao

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan does appreciate the support! A-Qing is a very sweet girl. All the same, he does understand Xingchen's reasoning too. You can't help who you love, and as much as he hates to admit it - Xue Yang isn't pure evil. There are clearly good sides to him, or Xingchen wouldn't have fallen for him.

The kiss gets a sweet, pleased little sound in response. "Mm..." He sighs and reluctantly sits up, smiling at the burst of healing. It's not like he really needs it, but he won't protest if Xingchen wants to fuss. He straightens out his hair a little, but doesn't bother even putting it up in the simple bun he'd kept it in.

her daddies!

[gentledawn]

She just wants a family! A-Qing is too frightened of Xue Yang to see his good sides, though even she will admit that he isn't awful when he's in a good mood. And he seemed to be in a good mood a lot when Xiao Xingchen was alive the first time.

She sets the table and peeks out of a window, hoping nothing scary is wandering around out there.

Xingchen swings his legs off of the bed and stands, remembering, suddenly, a task he used to like.

"Do you want me to brush your hair?"

xue yang: am i a joke to you

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan would never blame her for that! And he will make sure that both Xingchen and A-Qing are safe. Once everything is done, Song Lan brings it to the table.

Xue Yang had stopped wearing his hair ornaments and more elaborate hair styles since Xiao Xingchen's death. It hadn't been important. He does brighten considerably when Xingchen asks that though. "Yes," he says and happily seats himself comfortably on the bed.

a-qing: ...yup.

[gentledawn]

A-Qing feels awful about what happened to Zichen. She hadn't meant to lead him to his doom. She had really wanted him to find Xiao Xingchen first.

Xingchen hears the happiness and smiles. He seeks out the brush and he even finds Xue Yang's hair ornaments.

Covered in dust. He blows the dust off of them and walks back to Xue Yang. Then, sitting behind him, he patiently brushes through his hair and styles it how Xue Yang used to like it.

"Why did you stop wearing them?"

xy: :| well tough shit i am gonna marry xxc

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan only blames himself and Xue Yang for how things had turned out. He should have talked to Xingchen first, but he had seen the affection between him and Xue Yang and it had just... it had enraged him. He'd been convinced then that Xue Yang had been tricking Xingchen about everything. And Xue Yang hadn't exactly made him think differently. It had all been a disaster.

Xue Yang shrugs a little. "I couldn't be bothered. It just... it wasn't important."

a-qing: why do you wanna marry him? >8(

[gentledawn]

A-Qing just remembers being horrified and helpless. She had tried to approach Zichen after that, to bring him food and water, but she couldn't risk being seen by Xue Yang. Now it feels weird to be out in the open.

"I don't think we should stay here."

Xingchen frowns at the answer and tries to read between the lines.

"You were always so handsome with your hair back. I remember this little leaf." he smiles softly, "You chose it yourself."

xy: um because i love him???

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan glances at A-Qing hearing that before slowly nodding. He isn't sure whether Xingchen and Xue Yang will agree though. This place is full of bad memories, so maybe it'll be possible to convince them. Or at least convince Xingchen. He's sure that Xue Yang will go wherever Xingchen goes.

"Yeah..." He sighs softly and leans back into Xingchen. He's suddenly glad that Xingchen can't see how skinny and hollowed out he's become. He'd definitely not only neglected his hair... "I'll wear it again for you, Daozhang."

a-qing: >.> will you hurt him?

[gentledawn]

"Don't worry. I'll protect you, Daozhang." A-Qing reassures him, smiling as she sits at the table. She sips on the tea to wake herself, swinging her legs.

He may not be able to see the effects - not anymore - but he can feel them. Slipping his arms around Xue Yang, he notices that he is embracing bones more than anything else.

"Will you come eat for me?" he whispers into his lover's ear after he has seen to his hair.

xy: no :|

[bringingdowndisaster]

Song Lan smiles at that and nods again, gently stroking over A-Qing's hair. He seats himself at the table and takes a sip from his cup, trying not to think about what could be taking Xue Yang and Xingchen so long.

The whisper sends a shiver down Xue Yang's spine. He turns his head and kisses Xingchen. "Yes," he murmurs against his lips. "I'll do anything for you."

a-qing: he's a good person.

[gentledawn]

A-Qing knows all about grumpy morning Xue Yang. She does pity Daozhang Xingchen a little. Beaming up at Zichen, she enjoys the quiet and the tea.

Xingchen shudders and presses into the kiss, gently cupping one of Xue Yang's cheeks.

"Live." he encourages and stands up, holding out his hands to help Xue Yang do the same, "That's what I want."

[bringingdowndisaster]

Being kissed like that awakens his desires for Xingchen again, and he suddenly desperately wishes that A-Qing and Song Lan weren't in the next room... He can't resist giving Xingchen's bottom lip and light nibble before they part.

Xue Yang takes Xingchen's hands and gets to his feet, holding onto him as they make their way to the kitchen.

[gentledawn]

Later, he promises himself and Xue Yang both. Later. He will find a way for them to slip away and ease the ache of longing ever present between them.

Until then, they eat. He guides them to the table and smiles at Zichen, sensing where his soulmate is immediately.

"It smells good. Thank you, Zichen. Thank you, A-Qing."