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[bringingdowndisaster]

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[gentledawn]

"Ah..." Xingchen blushes darkly, his lips trembling, "My A-Yang. My Zichen." he clings to them, "Both of you are my reason...to live."

[bringingdowndisaster]

Xue Yang hugs Xingchen tighter hearing that. "And you're mine..." he whispers into his ear.

Song Lan feels a tightening in his chest and he leans in to softly kiss Xingchen. I will never leave you, my Xingchen...

[gentledawn]

Xingchen can't help smiling and he rubs over Xue Yang's arms, leaning back to nuzzle their cheeks together.

"You're mine too, you know." and he will make that clear every day!

Zichen's soft kiss has him stretching out his arms and embracing the other man against him.

How could I ever leave you, my Zichen?

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Xue Yang feels warm hearing that, nuzzling right back. "Good," he murmurs, sounding pleased. He wants to be Xingchen's, wants the other man to never let him go.

Song Lan lifts his hand and strokes Xingchen's cheek again. I drove you away from me once. I will never do that again.

[gentledawn]

Xingchen presses a kiss to Xue Yang's lips and smiles at the answer.

"I won't make you mourn ever again." he raises Xue Yang's hand and kisses his knuckles.

The soft fingers on his cheek draw him back to Zichen and he snuggles his lover, frowning a little.

Don't blame yourself. You were in immense pain. I didn't think beyond what you said. I was naive.

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Xue Yang lets out a shaky little sigh and kisses Xingchen's neck. "I won't hurt you again," he murmurs, "I promise." He'd sooner take his own life than hurt Xingchen.

I still owe you an apology. Being in pain doesn't excuse taking it out on you. I'm sorry, Xingchen.

[gentledawn]

Xingchen feels the scar under Xue Yang's lips and he wonders if it's unappealing to kiss.

"I know you won't. Just stay with me, A-Yang." he falls quiet, listening to Zichen then, his lips trembling at the apology.

"Zichen... We both need to learn about our...emotions." he smiles softly, "Anger doesn't always mean hate. It could mean pain."

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It's not! Kissing there is his quiet way to apologize.

"I will never leave you, A-Chen," he murmurs into his ear, placing a soft kiss to the shell.

Song Lan strokes Xingchen's cheek, fingers trembling a little. Yes. I was in pain. I could never hate you, Xingchen. I love you.

[gentledawn]

It's a very sweet gesture and Xingchen snuggles against Xue Yang, turning his head to kiss his cheek.

"I won't leave you either." he gives a happy shiver and then kisses Zichen's fingers slowly, one by one.

I see that now. It's so clear! I'm sorry for running away from you, love. I'm so glad you found me.

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Xue Yang feels reassured by that, though there's still one concern lingering... Remembering that Xiao Xingchen had taught him how to mentally communicate, he utilizes that too to ask, Even if Song Lan wanted you to?

Song Lan immediately warms feeling Xingchen's lips kissing his fingers.

I am too. I only wish that I would have spoken to you first, instead of confronting Xue Yang...

[gentledawn]

The new voice in his head makes him smile a little. Xingchen hears the question and immediately shakes his head. He and I have talked. He wouldn't ask that of me. You think too poorly of him, A-Yang. He isn't a cruel man.

Once he finishes kissing Zichen's fingers, he holds the man's hand to his chest.

You are speaking to me now. That's all that matters.

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He doesn't have to be cruel to want you to himself! If there is anything that Xue Yang can understand, it would be that. It's only because he doesn't want to make Xiao Xingchen unhappy that he's willing to accept this arraignment.

Song Lan smiles softly and nods, leaning down to press his lips to Xingchen's forehead.

[gentledawn]

But that would be cruel. You brought me back, Xue Yang, and he knows I love you. If he tried to keep me from you, that would hurt me too.

Xingchen explains gently, smiling a little at the kiss to his forehead. He then reaches for Xue Yang's hand and sneakily presses it against Zichen's hand.

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Xue Yang hates to admit it, but Xiao Xingchen may have a point with that... It's just difficult not to fear losing him - whether to death or to Song Lan. He'd been without him for a year and it had been absolute agony. Losing him forever would probably kill him.

I just don't... I don't want to lose you again. I can't. He holds Xingchen tighter, nuzzling into his neck. That's when he feels his hand being moved to Song Lan's, and he huffs out a small laugh. A blind man trying to be sneaky and not realizing how obvious he's actually being is pretty endearing.

So he squeezes Song Lan's hand a little, giving him a look that seems to say; Anything for Xingchen. Song Lan purses his lips, but he nods and squeezes Xue Yang's hand back. Anything for Xingchen.

[gentledawn]

Xue Yang's fear breaks his heart; he wishes he could soothe it all at once, but that will take time. This is the best he can do and when his love holds on tighter, he returns the affection, kissing his cheek.

As well as sneaking Xue Yang's hand into Song Zichen's. Oh he is very subtle! Don't let him think otherwise!

"Don't be sad, A-Yang. I am right here - as are you and Zichen. It's... It's wonderful. I know it's difficult, but this is...a blessing." his voice wavers.

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"You being here is a blessing," Xue Yang murmurs into Xingchen's neck. He couldn't have asked for something better. It's just a bit of a shame that Song Lan has to be here too, but he'll endure it for Xingchen's sake.

Song Lan can only agree with Xue Yang at that. He nods and strokes Xingchen's cheek, putting their foreheads together.

[gentledawn]

Xingchen shudders like a leaf in the wind, overwhelmed with their love and their presences. His darlings. He curls an arm around both and turns his head, kissing Xue Yang's forehead and then kissing his Zichen.

"Isn't this nice and warm? We should just relax."

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Xue Yang finds himself relaxing against Xingchen's body. "Mmm... yeah. It's still early," he murmurs and presses little kisses to his love's neck.

A pleased little sigh escapes Song Lan's lips when he's kissed. He feels better than he did before, even with Xue Yang here. Because at least they can both agree on taking care of Xingchen, and give him all the love that he deserves.

[gentledawn]

"It's okay for us to be a little lazy." Xingchen giggles and rubs his cheek against Xue Yang's soft hair, "I...get tired." he yawns and nestles down between them.

The little sigh Zichen gives him brings his smile back and he nuzzles their noses together.

"My two handsome loves."

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"Mmm, you're still recovering. You should rest whenever you feel like you need it," Xue Yang says, stroking a hand along Xingchen's side. "We'll be here."

Song Lan nods his agreement and tugs the blankets up over the three of them, kissing Xingchen's forehead.

[gentledawn]

"...thank you. Both of you." Xingchen whispers, tugging one of their hands onto his chest and warming them with his hands. It's probably difficult to tell how quickly he drifts off, but there are signs. His breathing is suddenly deeper and the hold he has on their hands relaxes, though he doesn't let go.

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Xue Yang smiles and watches Xingchen drift off with a tender expression on his face. He's slept next to Xingchen long enough to be able to tell when he's falling asleep. He then settles, comfortably cuddling up to his love and eventually drifting off himself.

Song Lan stays awake and watches Xingchen's peacefully sleeping face, keeping their foreheads together.

[gentledawn]

Their combined warmth ensures he has good dreams. In them, he can see and his loves are whole. They are also...intimate. And not just with him, either! Xingchen awakens with a small gasp some hours later, aroused.

The pressure against his forehead tells him his Zichen is watching over him and he kisses the man's cheek.

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Xue Yang finds himself growing a little hard in his sleep too. Being pressed up against Xingchen like this is certainly... inspiring. The gasp wakes him and he frowns a little, lifting a hand to stroke over Xingchen's hair. "Mn, are you okay?"

Song Lan smiles a little at Xingchen and gives him a soft kiss.

[gentledawn]

"Yes." Xingchen whispers, blushing. Yet being blind makes this...easier, somehow. "I was dreaming and... We were together. Intimately." he smiles into Zichen's kiss, returning the pressure tenderly.

"But at the end..." he continues after a short pause, "It wasn't just...each of you with me. You were with each other too."