bringingdowndisaster

bringingdowndisaster

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

gentledawn

A-Qing feels awful about what happened to Zichen. She hadn't meant to lead him to his doom. She had really wanted him to find Xiao Xingchen first.

Xingchen hears the happiness and smiles. He seeks out the brush and he even finds Xue Yang's hair ornaments.

Covered in dust. He blows the dust off of them and walks back to Xue Yang. Then, sitting behind him, he patiently brushes through his hair and styles it how Xue Yang used to like it.

"Why did you stop wearing them?"

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Song Lan only blames himself and Xue Yang for how things had turned out. He should have talked to Xingchen first, but he had seen the affection between him and Xue Yang and it had just... it had enraged him. He'd been convinced then that Xue Yang had been tricking Xingchen about everything. And Xue Yang hadn't exactly made him think differently. It had all been a disaster.

Xue Yang shrugs a little. "I couldn't be bothered. It just... it wasn't important."

From:

gentledawn

A-Qing just remembers being horrified and helpless. She had tried to approach Zichen after that, to bring him food and water, but she couldn't risk being seen by Xue Yang. Now it feels weird to be out in the open.

"I don't think we should stay here."

Xingchen frowns at the answer and tries to read between the lines.

"You were always so handsome with your hair back. I remember this little leaf." he smiles softly, "You chose it yourself."

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Song Lan glances at A-Qing hearing that before slowly nodding. He isn't sure whether Xingchen and Xue Yang will agree though. This place is full of bad memories, so maybe it'll be possible to convince them. Or at least convince Xingchen. He's sure that Xue Yang will go wherever Xingchen goes.

"Yeah..." He sighs softly and leans back into Xingchen. He's suddenly glad that Xingchen can't see how skinny and hollowed out he's become. He'd definitely not only neglected his hair... "I'll wear it again for you, Daozhang."

From:

gentledawn

"Don't worry. I'll protect you, Daozhang." A-Qing reassures him, smiling as she sits at the table. She sips on the tea to wake herself, swinging her legs.

He may not be able to see the effects - not anymore - but he can feel them. Slipping his arms around Xue Yang, he notices that he is embracing bones more than anything else.

"Will you come eat for me?" he whispers into his lover's ear after he has seen to his hair.

Edited Date: 2023-05-27 09:50 am (UTC)

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Song Lan smiles at that and nods again, gently stroking over A-Qing's hair. He seats himself at the table and takes a sip from his cup, trying not to think about what could be taking Xue Yang and Xingchen so long.

The whisper sends a shiver down Xue Yang's spine. He turns his head and kisses Xingchen. "Yes," he murmurs against his lips. "I'll do anything for you."

From:

gentledawn

A-Qing knows all about grumpy morning Xue Yang. She does pity Daozhang Xingchen a little. Beaming up at Zichen, she enjoys the quiet and the tea.

Xingchen shudders and presses into the kiss, gently cupping one of Xue Yang's cheeks.

"Live." he encourages and stands up, holding out his hands to help Xue Yang do the same, "That's what I want."

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Being kissed like that awakens his desires for Xingchen again, and he suddenly desperately wishes that A-Qing and Song Lan weren't in the next room... He can't resist giving Xingchen's bottom lip and light nibble before they part.

Xue Yang takes Xingchen's hands and gets to his feet, holding onto him as they make their way to the kitchen.

From:

gentledawn

Later, he promises himself and Xue Yang both. Later. He will find a way for them to slip away and ease the ache of longing ever present between them.

Until then, they eat. He guides them to the table and smiles at Zichen, sensing where his soulmate is immediately.

"It smells good. Thank you, Zichen. Thank you, A-Qing."

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Song Lan feels a wave of relief go through him when Xingchen and Xue Yang finally arrive. He notices that Xue Yang has his hair done in his old fashion. So that's what had taken them so long...

He smiles at Xingchen at least, even if the man can't see it.

Xue Yang just feels awkward as he sits at the table, as far from A-Qing and Song Lan as he can. "Yeah, thanks," he murmurs without looking at them. Instead he just starts to slowly drink his tea.

From:

gentledawn

Xingchen sits down beside Xue Yang to keep him calm. He picks up a cup of tea and inhales the rich scent, humming. It feels good to drink tea again. The flavor and the heat are comforting to his throat. He has quite a nasty scar under his bandages.

"Please, everyone, eat." he encourages. A-Qing digs in - she always has a healthy appetite. She is growing!

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Xue Yang doesn't have much of an appetite, but he eats enough to hopefully please Xingchen. He doesn't want to worry him.

Song Lan makes do with tea. He doesn't need to eat so there's no point in wasting food that would be better served by filling the bellies of Xingchen and A-Qing. He's the first to get up and start clearing the table when everyone is finished eating.

From:

gentledawn

Xingchen listens intently to Xue Yang eating and nods, happy with the amount. He eats as much as he can too - more to set a good example than out of hunger. His body just...isn't accustomed to these small tasks anymore.

"Let me help, Zichen." he gets up and gathers what he can, bringing it to the wash basin. Then he touches Zichen's hand, speaking to him mentally:

"My throat hurts. Would you mind examining my...neck...for me?"

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Xue Yang is glad to see Xingchen eating. He knows it'll probably be a while before he starts to feel hunger normally again, but that doesn't mean he shouldn't eat. His body needs the energy.

Song Lan fills the basin with water and looks up when Xingchen touches his hand. He frowns a little. Of course. We can do so once we're done here. He doesn't want A-Qing to have to see as he's sure that the scar must be pretty gruesome.

From:

gentledawn

He knows he needs to push forward even if he feels like resting. That's the only way his body will strengthen and remember how he used to be.

The pain concerns him, however. Enough so that he decides to go to Zichen. Xue Yang will only worry himself to death - and he isn't far from dying as it is - and A-Qing is much too young to see...what she has seen. He doesn't want to add to her pain.

Besides Zichen might have some ideas about the scarring.

"Thank you."

Xingchen helps clean the dishes and set them back where they are meant to be. Then he smiles and says:

"I will bring in some water so if anyone wants to bathe, they can. Zichen, will you help me?"

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Xue Yang can't help but to cast anxious glances at Xingchen and Song Lan. They're just washing dishes together, but he still can't help the jealousy just seeing them together. Can't help feeling insecure even though he's the one who is with Xingchen.

He doesn't want to be controlling though, so he doesn't say anything. Maybe a bath could be nice...

So as to not let Xue Yang know that they have an alternate way of communicating (oh yes he can feel his gaze on them), Song Lan takes Xingchen's hand and writes the character for "yes" into his palm with his finger.

Edited Date: 2023-05-27 11:05 am (UTC)

From:

gentledawn

Xingchen can feel the tension and the anxiety. He will show Xue Yang he has nothing to worry about soon, but... This must come first.

The answer on the palm of his hand earns a smile and he leads the way to the well, breathing out a sigh that wheezes slightly. Then, he unties the bandage around his neck, revealing the gash, the scar, he had caused with Shuanghua.

"How is it?"

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Xue Yang squirms anxiously on his chair, but manages to not follow the two of them. He steals a glance at A-Qing instead, but he soon looks away. He has no idea how to even begin talking to her.

Song Lan follows out to the well and watches carefully as Xingchen undoes the bandage around his throat. He eyebrows furrow and he shudders a little at the sight of the nasty scar. He remembers all too well how Xingchen had taken Shuanghua to his own throat and sliced it open. It's not a pleasant memory.

It looks healed to me. Perhaps not as healed as it should be by now... Your body might not have caught up entirely.

From:

gentledawn

A-Qing is a bit more brazen, narrowing her eyes at him.

"What are you up to anyway? You know they won't let you do what you did before, right?"

Xingchen visibly relaxes at the news he is...healing. Albeit slowly. He rests a hand gently on Zichen's chest, his legs feeling shaky with relief.

"Zichen... My Zichen..."

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Xue Yang glares back at A-Qing. "Are you an idiot as well as a liar?" he snaps, "You think I would've spent all that time trying to bring him back if I wanted to do the same shit all over again?"

Seeing Xingchen like this, Song Lan can't help wrapping his arms around him and pulling him into a warm embrace. He strokes a gentle hand over Xingchen's hair. My Xingchen...

From:

gentledawn

"I'm the liar?" A-Qing huffs out a laugh, "If you did, you would be crazy. You know he loves you, right? I don't know why, but it would suck if you ruined it."

Xingchen calms and curls into Zichen's hold. He rests his cheek against his soulmate's shoulder and smiles faintly.

"Are you in pain? I will do all I can for you."

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Xue Yang scowls, but he can't exactly argue with that. He hates how weak his voice sounds when he speaks again, "I know." Xiao Xingchen still loves him, somehow, and he's blessed to have been given a second chance. A chance to not fuck things up.

I am not. I feel very little pain on the whole. Probably another effect of being technically dead. He hadn't even felt it when Xue Yang had pushed those nails into his head.

From:

gentledawn

Damn. He's serious. She had almost hoped he wasn't. A-Qing sits back and sighs loudly.

"You're in deep."

Xingchen tilts his head and kisses Zichen's cheek, saddened by the coolness of his skin.

"I will find a way to bring you back too." he rests their heads together, "You deserve to be alive."

From:

bringingdowndisaster

Xue Yang makes an ugly face at her. "Yeah, no shit."

Song Lan smiles a little, touched by Xingchen's words though he doesn't think it's possible to make him more alive than he already is. It's alright, Xingchen. I am alive enough to hold you. That is what matters.

From:

gentledawn

"I'm still watching you." just so they are clear, "Daozhang Lan listens to me too."

So there.

"I want the best for you, love." Xingchen hugs Zichen for a little longer before pulling back. He reties the bandages around his neck and then pulls up the bucket from the well.